It's official, retro rocks! The lovable New Beetle was first, followed by the PT Cruiser with its love-it-or-hate-it design. Try finding one on a dealer's lot. Next in the pipeline is the 2002 Thunderbird two-seater with styling distinctly reminiscent of the 1955 original.

But how will you differentiate your new retro-mobile from all the rest? Why not use some of the accessories that adorned "cool" cars in decades past. Designed more for "show" than "go", a vast array of easily installed accessories let '50s and '60s drivers individualize their rides. Let's see what the best-dressed cars at the drive-in were wearing.

Step on it!
No self-respecting Saturday night cruiser went without a set of "barefoot" pedal covers. Tastefully executed in gleaming chrome and black, these foot-shaped beauties slipped easily over accelerator pedal and dimmer switch. Alas, dimmer switches are no longer on the floor so half of this kit will be wasted on your new ride.

To accompany his new pedals, the '60s driver could choose from an amazing array of replacement shift knobs. These included miniature pistons, 8-balls, pistol grips and human skulls. The latter were, of course, available with or without lighted eyes. See a parallel to the PT Cruiser's Q-ball shift knob?

Purple haze
Still at floor level, the cruiser's ambience was enhanced by the warm glow of purple mood lights in the footwells. Similar lights were sometimes mounted on the inside of the windshield pillars to bathe the windshield in blue light. It's debatable whether these lights reduced glare from oncoming headlamps, as claimed, but they certainly gave other drivers the impression of an approaching UFO.

One good turn
Sometimes called necker knobs, wheel spinners were rotating knobs attached to the steering wheel. Allegedly designed to facilitate sudden turns, they were mostly used for one-armed steering so that the driver's free arm could be wrapped casually around his main squeeze. Wheel spinners came in fixed and swing-away varieties, with or without a picture of a scantily clad cutie under a transparent cover.

Roll those bones!
Moving upward, the canny cruiser could add a chrome tissue dispenser atop the dash or perhaps a hula doll that would shake and shimmy up and down the Main Drag. For added effect, a nifty shrunken head or a set of plush dice could be hung from the rear view mirror. Truly elegant, especially if complemented by a "bathing beauty" air freshener dangling from a dash knob like a Christmas tree ornament.

Plush stuff
Speaking of the rear view mirror, it was often coddled in a mirror muff made of the same luxurious, deep-plush material found in the steering wheel cover. This tasteful set-up was oddly reminiscent of the plush, three-piece ensembles seen in too many bathrooms. To continue the theme, a matching plush pad could be added to the shelf behind the rear seat, thus creating the perfect place to display the obligatory nodding dog.

Play me a tune
Moving under the hood, a cool cruiser dude would often install an aftermarket horn. These attention-getters provided a wide variety of sounds ranging from a simple "Ah-oo-ga" to the opening bars of "Dixie" and other songs. Just the thing to subtly announce your arrival at the drive-in.

While under the hood, an engine dress-up kit could be added. This package usually included a replacement air cleaner, valve covers and dagger-style dipstick handle, all with a dazzling chrome finish. Guaranteed to impress, if not to increase horsepower.

Miniature ornamentals
Closing the hood, we might notice an aftermarket hood ornament. Perhaps an ornate harness racing sulky or an illuminated figure such as a swan with red or blue plastic wings. Very classy, if not quite up to the standard of Rolls Royce's Spirit of Ecstasy.

Looking down, we might encounter a pair of spring steel curb feelers mounted at the bottom of the front wheel arches. These engineering marvels sounded the alarm if a careless driver edged too close to a curb. Very useful to prevent scraping the whitewalls at the A&W drive-in.

Speaking of whitewalls, the cost-conscious owner could achieve the desired effect without the expense of a full set of new "wide whites". The answer was the "Port-A-Wall", a wide ring of white rubber installed over the sidewalls and retained by the wheel rim. Portable from car to car, of course, as suggested by the name. Just the thing for your PT Cruiser!

All that glitters
Reaching deep into the chrome bin, a cruiser's headlights were often treated to chromed half-moon covers, eyebrow visors, or both. Any reduction in light output would, of course, be of little consequence while cruising Main Street at "dead slow ahead" speed.

Among the most impressive bolt-ons were real or dummy spotlights. Mounted on the windshield pillars, these shoebox- or teardrop-shaped babies were coated in deep chrome with some varieties incorporating a rear view mirror. The best spotlights could be aimed from inside the car, just like those on Officer Obie's police cruiser. Clearly, aerodynamic drag was not a concern.

Spotlights looked great sitting below a chromed or painted windshield visor. Intended to shade occupants of the front seat, they also had the unexpected and unfortunate effect of restricting the driver's view of overhead traffic lights.

How exhausting!
When he reached his exhaust system, the cruiser had some decisions to make. One popular choice was a dual exhaust system with long, chromed tailpipes and throaty Thrush mufflers. Oddly, dual exhausts or "twice pipes" were sometimes seen on six cylinder cars, a subterfuge easily exposed at stoplight drag races.

As an option, decorative side exhaust pipes or "lakes pipes" could be mounted under the rocker panels. In either case, serious machines often featured an exhaust "cut-out" valve. When activated, this gizmo by-passed the mufflers, thus increasing noise and power while amusing the local constabulary.

A wheely big show
For the big bucks boys, replacement wheels from Cragar, Centerline and others were the way to go. For those with thinner wallets, ugly stock wheels could be transformed by a set of "Moons". These smooth hubcaps were originally developed by California hot rodder Dean Moon. "Full-moons" covered the entire wheel while "half-moons" covered only the centre portion. Half-moons were often accompanied by chrome trim rings that dressed-up the outer portion of the wheel.

Skirting the issue
A variety of steel or fiberglass fender skirts were available for most cars. The simplest filled the rear wheel arch area and featured a chrome-plated or body-colour finish. Larger "balloon skirts" covered the wheel arch area and extended back to the rear bumper. Either way, the desired visual effect was achieved.

Bringing up the rear
At the rear, the consummate Saturday night cruiser had a number of options. For maximum impact, the rear bumper was moved back a foot or so to accommodate a Continental Kit housing the spare tire. Apart from its visual effect, this accessory increased available trunk space, always useful when sneaking your buddies into the drive-in movie. Surprisingly, trendy retailer Neiman Marcus did not offer a Continental Kit option on the limited-production 2002 Thunderbirds recently offered in its Christmas Book.

For a more subtle rear treatment, replacement taillight lenses, often incorporating a blue dot, would be used. Finally, for the truly vulgar, there was always the option of a 100" whip antenna with its obligatory rain gutter clip for low clearance situations.

For those who were too young to drive in the '50s and '60s, fear not! Many of these goodies are still available at your local auto parts store or from other sources including the amazing J.C. Whitney mail-order catalogue. Get 'em while they last!


Copyright © 2003 Murray Jackson All rights reserved.
Back to Articles